Conflict Resolution

In my life, I've had plenty of conflicts and disagreements. Possibly because I'm extremely opinionated.  However, when it comes to conflict and disagreements I usually end with the statement "let's agree to disagree". Not only because as I want my position and opinion to be respected I want to always show respect for the opinions and position of my opposition.

Recently I had a teacher in my center who approached me and was a very upset. She felt that her co-teacher was abusive and she wanted her fired.  when I inquired about of the abuse that she was suggesting was occurring in the classroom she said she did not like the tone in which the teacher spoke to the children.  The co-teacher has been employed at my center for multiple years the parents love her, the children adore her, her colleagues respect her, and it was the first complaint.  This would be the first I've ever heard of her being abusive are speaking harshly to the children. I assured the teacher that I would look into the matter as to not be dismissive of a very serious allegation.  I explained that I would conduct an investigation and upon the results of the investigation I would make my decisions on the matter.  After doing some inquiries and doing my own observation I noticed that the teacher was very direct in her speech. She is compassionate and understanding but very clear when she spoke to the children. The co-teacher had a more singsong and harmonic way of speaking to the children she used a lighter tone and was very nurturing when speaking with the children. I paired the two teachers together because I thought that the presence of both types of teachers in the classroom with bring about a necessary balance. At the end of my investigation I decided the teacher was not abusive to the children there was no other concerns about her being abusive to the children from other staff or the parents. So I dropped the issue. The teacher was then infuriated with me. She accused me of being complicit with child abuse and that she would report me and my center to the department of family children services as well as bright from the start. I was defensive and angry but I ultimately decided that I understood her point of view.  I informed her that I understood her position and I appreciate her passion for the children and their safekeeping. I also instructed her to do what she felt was necessary if in fact she thought that I was complicit in child abuse and her co-teacher was guilty of child abuse.  It is her responsibility as a mandated reporter to go to all avenues to report the maltreatment of the children I would support her and doing that as an alternative investigation could probably yield the same results as mine. She then felt that I was being condescending. I also reassured her that I found her very valuable to our center the children loved her and she has no poor reputation amongst the other teachers. I expressed to her my appreciation for her diligence as a child advocate.  Confident in my internal investigation, I informed her that I would support her contacting an outside entity to do another investigation. I asked her to consider that instead of thinking that the teacher was abusive that maybe she had a different method of communication not everyone will communicate as she and as she wants to be respected for her methods of communication and interacting with the children, other people also want to be respected for their methods as well.  I told her why I paired her with the other teacher and how I thought both personalities will be beneficial for creating balance and harmony in the classroom. If she would be open to a more direct teacher as the direct teacher is more open to a more passive teacher. She agreed and as she developed a better relationship with her co-teacher she began to understand that teachers method of communication and they have and a since become a very organized and successful teacher team.
I remember this example specifically because I was very annoyed with this teacher because blanket accusations can be damaging to a teacher reputation. However, as I've learned in the strategies from this class and the course text. understanding her point of view and why she was distressed made me respect her position and instead of being immediately dismissive of the accusation because I disagreed with it, I then conducted an investigation. Because it could be possible that the teacher was mistreating the children. I think that in this situation I used the 3 R's to diffuse the situation respond to it appropriately and show respect for all parties involved. As an Early childhood educator, Child Care center owner and administrator,  it is important for me to always use the 3 Rs in my communication. I have to show respect to the children to my colleagues to the parents to other professionals that I come across. I always have to respond to acknowledge that I understand, I am empathetic and I'm listening to the plights and the concerns of the children my colleagues my staff members and my family. And as I do the first two r's I stand to gain a more in-depth and meaningful relationship with all.